University life can be exciting and enriching – but also stressful, isolating, and full of pressure. For many students, especially those in their final year or pursuing postgraduate degrees, the intensity of deadlines, dissertations, and high expectations can take a real toll on their wellbeing.
Whether your young adult is away at university or has returned home temporarily, your support can make a big difference. Here’s how you can help them manage this demanding stage of their academic journey.
1. Understand the Pressure They’re Under
University-level study demands independence, self-motivation, and long hours of concentrated work. Students may be juggling coursework, final projects, part-time jobs, and job or postgraduate applications – all while trying to stay healthy and get enough sleep. Those working towards Firsts or distinctions, especially in competitive fields, often place immense pressure on themselves to maintain perfection.
Simply acknowledging how intense it all is can be incredibly helpful. Avoid unhelpful comparisons like, “You always cope well under pressure,” or “Back in my day…” Instead, offer empathy: “It sounds like a lot. You’re working so hard.”
2. Be a Listening Ear, Not a Problem Solver
Many students just want someone to listen without judgement or unsolicited advice. If they’re venting about group work, unclear feedback, or looming deadlines, resist the urge to offer quick fixes. Instead, reflect back what you’re hearing: “That sounds really frustrating” or “I can see why you’re so stressed.”
If they do ask for help – whether it’s proofreading, a mock interview, or talking through a concept – step in gently, without taking over.
3. Offer Practical Support
When students come home, try not to overload them with plans, chores, or expectations to socialise – especially if they’re home to focus on work or recover from intense weeks.
What they often need is:
- Proper meals (which they’ll appreciate more than you know)
- A quiet, clean space to work or sleep
- The freedom to be unsociable without guilt
You can also support from afar by:
- Sending care packages or food delivery vouchers
- Helping with time management tools if they ask
- Reassuring them that their worth isn’t tied to grades
4. Encourage Breaks and Perspective
Students often feel guilty taking breaks, even though rest is vital to avoid burnout. You can help by:
- Reminding them that productivity isn’t constant
- Encouraging short walks or outings
- Watching a film or a sports match on TV
Let them know it’s okay to step back. A 30-minute break won’t ruin a degree – but pushing through exhaustion might.
5. Celebrate Their Effort, Not Just Outcomes
Especially for perfectionists, it’s important to affirm the effort, not just the result. Say things like, “You can be proud of how much you’ve put into this,” or “You’re doing your best, and that’s enough.”
Whether they come home beaming or burnt out, be their steady, safe place. Remind them that they are loved and valued beyond academic success.
University life is a time of growth, challenge and transformation. With a little understanding and a lot of compassion, you can help your student not just survive – but thrive.